


Alice in Monsterland - Part I

by ultradaniblonde



Series: Siren Series (Alice) [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Bullying, F/M, Friendship, Gay Character, High School, Past Domestic Violence, Suicide, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2019-04-22 21:11:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14317230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ultradaniblonde/pseuds/ultradaniblonde
Summary: Part 1: Alice, a 17-year-old high school student with a tragic past, adjusts to her new social status with the help of Kevin Tran and Charlie Bradbury.





	1. Begin at the Beginning

_Flashback_

You glance nervously at the full-length mirror, your stomach twisted into knots. You know Jeff is downstairs making small talk with your parents hating every minute of it. He will most likely bitch about it later in the car, but for now you take a minute to admire your reflection. You’re sure the dance will be littered with updo hairstyles and fake eyelashes, but you opted for a more natural look. Your shoulder length blonde hair falls into soft beach waves. You applied more makeup than your weekday routine, not hard considering you barely wear any at all, but made sure to emphasize your eyes. They are brown with flecks of gold.

The dress you picked cost more than your parents wanted to spend, but it fits like it was custom made. It is forest green lined lace with fitted long sleeves that show off your lean arms. The sleeves end in a delicate eyelash trim at your wrist. The bottom half, which leaves about two inches of your torso exposed, cascades into a panels of lace creating a full skirt that ends just below your ankles. You opted for gold flats instead of heels, knowing you would most likely just abandon them the minute you walk into the dance. With a deep breath you steady your nerves and walk out of your room.

As you walk down the stairs, your hand gently on the balustrade to keep you from falling, your mom says “Oh Alice. You look so beautiful,” snapping pictures. “Doesn’t she look beautiful, James?” she asks your Dad. Your dad gives a nondescript “Mmhmm” not even cracking a smile making you think he wishes the dress showed less of your torso. Oh well, you think to yourself sweetly. If you are going to be an absent father….

You steal a glance at Jeff. He is wearing a black suit holding a cream corsage. Jeff is the type of guy who would look good in anything. He is a senior and quarterback of the varsity team; he is tall with broad shoulders, blonde hair and green eyes. Even you have to admit he is especially hot in his suit. You smile and ask him, “How do I look?” noticing his eyes look a little glazed. “You look like the most beautiful girl I have ever seen,” he responds, eliciting an “Awww” from your mom. Worth every penny, you think to yourself.

He removes the corsage from the package and slides it onto your wrist careful not to snag the lace. Your mom missed the moment, of course, and makes you awkwardly recreate the pose so she can take more pictures. You don't know why she even bothers, considering it isn't like she is going to show pictures of you with your Homecoming date around the office. You unwrap Jeff’s boutonniere and try to pin it to him without drawing blood. You laugh nervously as he stares at you the entire time you try and affix the flowers to his lapel.

“Just a few more pictures of the happy couple,” your mom says as you inwardly roll your eyes. After she takes a dozen more photos, you sneak a peak out the window. The beautiful clear October morning has turned into a drizzly wet night. Jeff escorts you to the car while holding a huge umbrella over your head. He opens the door for you and you gather your skirt in your arms trying to cram yourself in the front seat. Finally out of the rain, you smooth your skirt out hoping it hasn’t snagged or crinkled. Raindrops drip from Jeff’s hair as he takes a seat behind the wheel. “Hey,” you say softly, finally alone. “Hey beautiful” he says tipping your chin up giving you a soft kiss. You notice that his eyes are still glassy and hope he hasn’t been drinking. The car roars as he turns the key in the ignition and eases out of your driveway.

“Alice you really do look amazing,” Jeff says navigating the car to the highway.

“Thank you,” you respond with a smile.

“Alice, I know you don’t want to talk about this tonight, but I have to bring it up again” Jeff says eyes glued to the road. You immediately stiffen knowing exactly what “this” is and where the conversation is headed.

“Jeff, can we please just enjoy tonight? I really don’t think we should talk about this right now,” you say sincerely.

“But Alice next year, I won’t be here. We agreed to do long distance, but I am worried” he says agitated.

“What are you worried about? It won’t be easy, but I love you” you say pleadingly.

“I just need more of a commitment. We have to be together,” he says adamantly.

You tread lightly carefully considering your next words. You have been dating Jeff for almost two years and recently he has become even more possessive. You used to be flattered by his jealously, but last month he was suspended for breaking your chemistry partner’s arm. He was a shy freshman trying to make friends. They still haven’t removed the pins keeping his bones together. After a huge argument, Jeff agreed to keep his temper in check, but just last week he left you with a purplish bruise around your wrist after finding you talking to a fellow track team member. You still remember sitting on your bed as tears slipped out of your eyes staring at the bruise. Thank goodness you had the foresight to pick a dress with long sleeves you thought to yourself sarcastically.

“I think we should get married,” Jeff says calmly pulling you from your memories.

“WHAT? Married? Are you of your mind? I am sixteen,” you shout.

Jeff grabs your wrist squeezing, “What you don’t want to marry me?” he asks in an unhinged tone. He is squeezing your still tender wrist. “Is there someone else? Or were you just going to play the field while I am away?” he says accusingly.

You clench your teeth trying to keep the pain from your voice. “Let me out” you say vehemently.

Jeff takes his eyes off the road a second to look at you shocked. “Are you crazy? It’s raining and we have to get to the dance,” he says.

“ **LET ME OUT NOW** ” you scream.

He pulls up to a Gas ‘n’ Sip off the side of the road. You grab handfuls of your skirt hauling yourself out of the car. You slam the passenger door shut as you walk into the gas station. Unconcerned with the rain or whether your dress has snagged, you fumble for your phone. Jeff speeds away with a murderous look. You scroll through your contacts mentally preparing yourself for the conversation that is about to occur.

_Ring._

_Ring._

“Hello? Hello?!”

“Mom. MOM, it’s me. I am at the Gas ‘n’ Sip off of 59. Can you come get me?” you say exasperated. Can't answer the phone like a normal person .. you think to yourself. 

“What happened?” your mom says shocked.

“MOM! Just please come get me. Please,” you add desperately. You hear rustling in the background as she grabs her keys and coat.

“I will be there soon,” she says.

As you are about to hang up, your phone beeps letting you know you have another call. Jeff. Against your better judgment you answer.

“Jeff, I really don’t think we should talk right now,” you say immediately.

“Alice, you don’t understand. You don’t get it. I have to be with you,” he says frantically.

“Jeff you are upset and driving and we shouldn’t be talking about this right n—,“ you say. 

“No!” he cuts you off. “I know what ‘talking about it later’ means. It means you are going to break up with me,” he says as you hear his car accelerate.

“Jeff. I love you, but I am hanging up now. This isn’t safe,” you say seriously.

“Alice. You d--- under—“ the call starts to crackle “I can’t li—without y--. I lo-- you, Alice” he says as the call drops.

_Next Morning_

The police fish Jeff’s Mustang out of the river the next morning. They drag the river and find his body shortly after. His death is ruled an accident, but you know better. They plan on conducting an autopsy to determine if drugs and alcohol were involved. You stand on the bridge in an oversized sweater, your head throbbing from crying all night. Your mom tries to put a comforting arm around your shoulders as the police ask you question after question. You wipe your nose with an already soaked tissue as they move on from asking you whether Jeff had been drinking and more about your argument. Question after question.

Tears leak out of your eyes as it dawns on you, _they blame you._


	2. Keep Your Temper

_Present Day_

**Buzz.**

**Buzz.**

**Buzz.**

Your phone vibrates as the chimes let you know it’s time to get up. You hit snooze and roll over. The heavy covers create a warm cocoon shielding you from reality even if only for a few minutes.

**Buzz.**

**Buzz.**

**Buzz.**

Damnit. How did ten minutes fly by so fast, you think to yourself. You pick up your phone and shut off the alarm, heaving yourself from the warmth of your bed. What have I done to deserve this, you think dramatically to yourself. Mornings are hard. You step onto the cold hardwood floor dragging yourself to the bathroom. Unthinkingly, you brush your teeth and wash your face. Not bothering with makeup, you walk to your closet grabbing the first t-shirt you see. It is from a 5K you ran years ago. You wore it so many times there were holes in the arms, so you cut the sleeves off. You make a mental note to grab your jacket so you don’t violate the patriarchal outdated dress code.

As you pull your blonde hair back into a ponytail and lace up your white converse, you hear your mom from the kitchen “Alice! Are you awake?” “I’m up!” you yell back. You wince internally. Your voice came out more annoyed than you had intended. You have been trying to exhibit more patience with your parents. The last year has been hard on everyone. Although, I would say it has been the hardest for me, you think to yourself cynically.

After Jeff … after Homecoming the gossip mill descended on your family amply fueled by the accident, your parents’ professional status, and the fact that you are adopted. It was the perfect combination for circles that thrive on scandal and speculation. As you walk into the kitchen, your parents are pouring coffee into their travel mugs. “Morning Alice,” your mom says in a hurried tone. She’s wearing her classic navy suit, cream blouse and brown heels with matching purse. It must be a court day you think to yourself. “Morning” your dad mumbles. “Morning, Dad” you say groggily. “Lilly, I am going to be late tonight. Clients,” your dad says brusquely. “Okay. Alice, I should be home by six. Remember to do your homework,” she says with a quick kiss on your cheek. You feel a pang of guilt. These days your parents’ facial expressions seem to cycle between, preoccupied, distressed, and harassed. You hope it is work related and they aren’t fielding any more questions about the tragic incident with their daughter.

The room instantly calms as your parents leave. You take a deep breath and pour yourself the rest of the coffee. You leisurely drink it at the kitchen table appreciating the tranquility. As ten minutes pass you think: school. Right. You grab a banana, your backpack, and your beat up moto jacket. Got to get to school.

As you pull into the parking lot, you ignore the lurch of your car as you awkwardly shift into park. To add to your discomfiture, you are still getting the hang of driving. Jeff drove you to school freshman and sophomore year. After Homecoming your mom drove you the rest of the year even though it put a horrible strain on her work schedule. Over the summer, you took drivers education in an attempt to no longer be a burden. Pathetic, you think to yourself.

You step out of your car and walk towards the entrance. Students stream past you. An exhale escapes your lips, a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. Last year, Jeff’s football friends would congregate in the parking lot. Some of your track friends would come by and you would all walk in together. Since Homecoming, you dread the walk from your car to the entrance. The blissful isolation makes you think maybe today won’t be so bad.

Second period passes without incident. No longer a member of the track team, you weave through the throngs of students without notice and make it to your locker. You rotate the lock like clockwork trying to grab your books as quickly as possible.

“Hey Alice,” you hear a voice say to your left.

Brandon. Fuck. Don’t engage him, you think to yourself.

“So some of the guys and I have theory,” he continues indifferent to the fact that you haven’t acknowledged him. “You see, Brad back here was going to ask you to Homecoming,” he says motioning back to a group of three junior boys, two of them with arms around their girlfriends.

Great. Spectators. Perfect.

“… And we thought, what a perfect opportunity to test our hypothesis. We believe that Jeff took a nosedive off that bridge, because you wouldn’t give it up. I mean it’s no secret you were holding out on him,” he says in a mock whisper. “So all you have to do is give it up to my man Brad here, and if he doesn’t bite the dust on Homecoming night, then mystery solved,” he says smiling back at his audience.

Your blood pumps so loudly your hearing is muffled. The rage, it courses through your arms till you feel like it might shoot out of your fingertips. You feel the pressure increasing as if you might burst. 

“Mr. Fry” you hear a muffled voice hear from behind you. “I imagine you and your friends have somewhere to be right now? Third period, perhaps?” the voice asks just as the third period bell rings.

Brandon’s eyes are full of mockery as he and his friends walk away.

You turn to the voice. Mr. Anderson, the history teacher. Before you can say anything he says “Get to class, Alice” stalking away.

As you settle into your seat tugging off your jacket, you replay the encounter in your head. Your skin starts to cool from the rage you felt earlier. You haven’t had an incident in months. No insincere girls prying for grisly details under the guise of a sympathetic ear. No oversexed guys figuring with Jeff out of the picture, they have a chance. No rumors that you drove Jeff crazy, because you insisted on waiting to sleep with him.

You finally calm down as the sound of your name pulls you out of your thoughts.

“Annie? Earth to Annie?” Mr. Flood says clearly irritated.

“Yes?” you say as the class snickers.

“Does this look like a brothel to you?” he asks seriously.

“What?” you ask laughing shakily. Mr. Flood is a million years old and you don’t know whether you should be genuinely concerned if he is going senile.

“Is this a brothel?” he asks again gratingly.

Your smile evaporates.

“No. Mr. Flood, it isn’t,” you answer.

“I didn’t think so. As such, please kindly put your clothes back on,” he says pointing to your jacket.

For the love of … “I didn’t realize my bare shoulders were so distracting, Mr. Flood. I will try harder not to impede anyone’s learning with my forearms,” you snap back shoving your arms into your jacket.

You are already halfway across the classroom, when he says “Principal’s Office”

“I hope you all recognize the _sacrifice_ I am making for your education,” you shout to the class as you slam the door open.

_Later that Afternoon_

“You didn’t?” Kevin asks you with a horrified look on his face.

The two of you are in your kitchen. He is seated at a bar stool while you rummage through the refrigerator.

“He was being a dick and this was after my run in with Brandon. I think I showed an amazing amount of self restraint” you respond.

It is seven and of course your mom isn’t home. In mom speak, six really means she won’t be home till after nine. Considering you spent an hour in detention, you are lucky she is so busy. You texted Kevin to let him know you would be late.

“Are you hungry?” you ask as you continue to rummage through the refrigerator.

Kevin is your best friend. He doesn’t go to the local public high school. He attends an exclusive private school nearby which is probably why you two are so close. He knows about Jeff, but didn't witness the aftermath.

“No. I actually need to head out. Sorry,” he says with a weak smile.

“Don’t worry about it. Thanks for coming over. I know your mom is really cracking down on you,” you say trying to keep the disappointment from your voice.

“Of course!” he responds grabbing his overstuffed backpack, folding his navy blazer over his arm. “Just make it to the weekend” he says with what you are sure he considers an encouraging smile.

Weekend.. Right, you think to yourself. You walk him out deciding to abandon dinner and go for a run.

You head upstairs and throw on your shorts and Nikes. You quit track after Jeff… after homecoming, but you never stopped running. It was the only thing that kept you sane, the only thing keeping you sane. You tuck your headphones into your ears as you head out into the night.

Just make it to the weekend.


	3. We’re All Mad Here

_Friday_

You sit in eighth period anxious for the bell to ring. You finished your quiz fifteen minutes ago, confident you aced it. Mr. Anderson makes you wait until the other students are done, so you sit staring at the clock. You have always excelled at school achieving a level of academic status that allows you to remain largely unnoticed considering your teachers are only concerned with students who are floundering. You plan on taking a handful of AP credits next year to get a head start on college. As the minutes tick by, you look forward to seeing your friends. The remainder of the week has been blessedly bully free and you successfully made it to the weekend.

The bell rings and you head straight to the parking lot not bothering to stop at your locker and risk subjecting yourself to taunting. You turn the key and take a deep breath; grateful for the illusion of privacy your car affords you. You ease out of the parking lot and soak in the sunshine on your way to Charlie’s house. Charlie and Kevin are your best friends, admittedly your only friends. You pull up to the small house and park on the street.

Charlie answers the door and you hold back a laugh. Where as Kevin makes his prep school uniform look polished, professional and collegiate, Charlie makes hers look provocative. Her skirt is rolled at least twice and her blouse has more than a couple of buttons undone. _Heartbreaker_ , you think to yourself. Charlie is gay. Kevin is too. You still remember the day you met them.

_Flashback_

You walk into the bookstore cringing as the bell chimes alerting the staff a customer has entered. It has been three weeks after Jeff’s .. after Homecoming and you and your mom argued about your ACT prep class. She insists you attend the prep course you signed up for months ago, but you are adamant you can study on your own. Truthfully, you don't think you can take the emotional strain of a prep course with more gawking and prying eyes.

Clad in a black shapeless sweater, leggings and winter boots that look more apt to exploring the moon, you stomp over to the ACT prep section. You have been avoiding mirrors, but you don’t need to see your reflection to know there are giant dark circles under your eyes and your skin has adopted an unhealthy pallor. As you skim the ACT prep books, an Asian boy carrying a large stack of books trips over a stool. Books and papers fly everywhere as a few people snigger. You roll your eyes and start grabbing books helping him collect his things. Why would one person need so many books, you think to yourself. As you hand them back to him, he says “Thanks” avoiding your eyes. “No problem” you respond turning back to the stacks.

You are halfway back to the shelves when a thought occurs to you. Your mom can’t wholeheartedly object to you preparing for the ACT alone, if you have a tutor. “Hey, wait a minute” you shout as you chase after him.

“Yeah?” he asks defensively.

“I am Alice,” you said stupidly, as if that explains everything.

“I’m Kevin Tran. Advanced Placement,” he responds.

“Riiiight” you say. Okay, so both of our people skills are rusty.

“I noticed you have a ton of books. I am assuming you are studying for the ACT?” you ask.

“Yeah, I am. My mom insists.. I mean… I need a 35 if I even have a shot at getting into my top schools” he says quickly.

A 35 you think to yourself … isn’t a 36 a perfect score? You shake off the internal monologue.

“That’s cool” you say halfheartedly. “So how would you feel about studying together sometime?” you ask.

“I don’t know. What do you bring to the table?” he asks seriously.

You swallow your indignation and respond, “Well, I am scoring really high in English and Reading” you say curtly.

“Hmm” you can see him mulling it over. “We are lacking in the English and Reading portion. Okay. You are in” he says decisively.

“Great! When do we start?” you ask.

“Charlie and I study at the library every Saturday morning from eight to eleven. You can meet us there. Let me grab your number” he says scrambling for his phone.

“Why don’t I just get yours?” you say pulling your phone out of your pocket.

The following Saturday, you are a bundle of nerves. You hope Jeff’s .. Homecoming doesn’t come up somehow. You spot Kevin sitting alone at a large table. You drop your bag onto the table.

Kevin mumbles “Hi” barely glancing up from his notes.

As you unpack your bag you hear, “What’s up, bitches?” from behind you.

“Hey Charlie” Kevin responds eyes still glued to his papers.

“This must be Alice. Welcome to the Fellowship” she says hand extended. You shake her hand and can’t help but smile.

“She’s cute,” Charlie says to Kevin.

“Charlie, if you could please leave your passionate love life out of our study group, I would appreciate it. There are other matters at hand here. Life and Death,” Kevin says with absolute seriousness.

Kevin passes out practice tests while you exchange glances with Charlie.

A few hours later, Kevin grades your practice tests while you and Charlie grab caffeine.

“So Alice. What’s your deal?” she asks.

You immediately freeze, “What do you mean” you ask trying to sound casual.

“Just curious. Kevin and I don’t have an extensive social circle,” she says.

“Oh, I ran into Kevin at the bookstore and I really need to work on my ACT score” you say quickly.

"Makes sense” she says.

You both order large soy lattes and a red eye for Kevin. You wonder whether he should really be consuming so much caffeine. As you take sip Charlie says, “Alice, I am going to be straight with you. Well actually the opposite. Poor choice of words” she says shrugging. “Kevin and I are gay. It’s how we became friends. Going to a super conservative prep school doesn’t leave a lot of options for two openly gay kids. Plus I really feel like he needs to loosen up sometimes and I think we really balance each other out… anyway..” she says bringing herself back on track “If that’s a problem, then we should probably part ways now,” she concludes.

You take another sip of your latte. “Charlie, I don’t care that you and Kevin are gay. It doesn’t bother me. At all” you say. “If we are being honest with each other, I guess I should tell you.”

“You are gay too?” she interrupts excitedly.

You smile weakly “No. Not gay. I am battling my fair share of drama too at the moment. Did you hear about that guy who drove off a bridge last month?” you ask.

“Yeah, I remember hearing about that and thinking it was really sad,” she says sincerely.

“He was my boyfriend. We were fighting .. arguing and .. people have been asking me about it ever since …and I..” you babble fighting the emotions threatening to overwhelm you.

“Alice, I am so sorry,” Charlie says squeezing your hand. “It is going to be okay, alright? You are going to be okay,” she says rubbing your back in circles. “Losing someone is hard especially when you feel like it's your fault. If you want to talk, anytime, I am here to listen,” she says softly. “Although, I wouldn’t recommend trying to bring it up during study group time,” she says with a weak smile as you turn and see Kevin vehemently marking up your practice tests with red pen. It was the hardest you laughed in weeks.

Kevin’s cell phone chirps bringing you back to the present. “I need to take this,” he says with absolute seriousness. You look at Charlie confused. “Hello” Kevin whispers. “Can’t talk. At the library...” he mutters into the phone. “Mom!” his volume momentarily spiking, “Mom. The librarian is giving me dirty looks,” he whisper/yells. “Gotta go,” he says quickly disconnecting the call.

“Did you just pretend you were at the library?” Charlie asks with a look of disbelief.

“You don’t understand!” Kevin shouts falling backwards onto Charlie’s bed with his hands over his eyes.

“You need a break,” you say earnestly. “Seriously Kevin, you are going to burn out. Let’s do something fun tonight,” you suggest.

“Yeah! We could have a Harry Potter marathon .. or .. not...” Charlie says seeing the daggers you are shooting at her with your eyes.

“There is nothing to do in this stupid town,” Kevin moans.

“We could go to the art fest they are having on Main. It will most likely be all blown glass, but we could walk there and it would get us out of the house. Plus we could grab some wine coolers .. hmmm..” you say encouragingly nudging Kevin.

“There are probably are some cute local artists,” Charlie says mischievously.

“Fine. Let’s do it. At least I can tell myself it is instructive,” Kevin says shaking his head.

Charlie changes out of her schoolgirl uniform into jeans and a crop top. Kevin undoes the top button of his white button down and suddenly looks very handsome in a model type way. Charlie lends you some clothes and you find yourself in short motorcycle boots with studs and an oversized green short sleeve button down top that Charlie insists you leave mostly unbuttoned. Your black lace bra peeks out but Charlie says it just looks wrong buttoned.

As the three of you walk towards Main you pass a '67 Impala. “That’s the car I was telling you about,” Charlie shouts enthusiastically. “I have been seeing it all around town. Isn’t she beautiful?” Charlie croons.

“Um yeah, totally..” Kevin responds as you shrug your shoulders at him.

You hang out around the corner from the liquor store waiting for someone to walk by so you can ask them to buy you a pack of wine coolers. Charlie drags Kevin over to the car to get a closer look leaving you on wine cooler duty. You see a mid-twenty-year old walking towards you and try to lean casually against the wall.

“Hey” you say with a smile as he walks by in a daze.

“Hi. Can I help you?” he says looking around as if you are child separated from your parents. You are struck by how tall he is, like enormous. His shaggy brown hair falls into his eyes and you resist the urge to push it back. His brown eyes look at you quizzically. You realize you have been staring and try to recover.

“Actually you can. I forgot my ID at home. Could you maybe grab me a pack of wine coolers? I would really appreciate it,” you ask giving him a big smile. He throws his head back and laughs.

Shit, you think to yourself.

“Wine coolers, huh” he asks teasingly. “Yeah. They are an acquired taste I guess” you say laughing.

“Sure. No problem. I’ll be right back,” he says walking away before you can hand him the bills you have ready in your pocket.

Sam walks into the liquor store still shaking his head laughing. Wine coolers. Dean would never let him hear the end of it if he drank a wine cooler. He grabs a case of beer and then stands in front of the refrigerator that holds wine coolers. He scrunches his eyebrows together. He knows you are underage, but how much trouble could you get into with six wine coolers? He laughs at your self-assurance and wonders just how young you are while grabbing your six-pack.

You hear the chime of the liquor store door and stand waiting for your gigantic stranger. He hands you a brown bag.

“I really shouldn’t be doing this,” he says with a slightly guilty look on his face.

“Don’t worry. I can handle myself around a couple of wine coolers,” you say with a wink.

He shakes his head laughing walking back the way he came.

You forgot to pay him. Again. Oh well.

The kindness of strangers, you think to yourself, as you walk towards Charlie and Kevin.


End file.
